Ever Enough?

Why does it always feel as though you are not enough?

Why is all that was done still not a parameter enough?

Isn’t the feeling of being pain struck the same for all?

Isn’t compassion and kindness for every living soul?

Kindness doesn’t cost a penny,

To satisfy all – an illusion of many.

The continuous spills of venom does all but stings,

Breaks one slowly into uncountable miniscules.

Staggering each day to see one beaming with pride,

Is that too much to ask by someone strong yet fragile?

Slowly engulfing into that ocean dark,

Don’t know will you ever be enough?

Will you ever be enough?

©Arpita

The Last Battle

While you are one in a million,

She was an average girl,

Serene, calm and with a smile,

One could say,she was happy,

But that was for a short while.

Relations unpredictable and life was a mess,

Her life was far from sorted,

And she just wished she retorted.

 

She did vent out her feelings,

But you paid no heed,

Thus she kept all inside,

Trying to convince her each day everything was alright.

She was lying,

I wonder, how couldn’t you figure it out from the dullness in her eyes?

 

She fought her battle as long as she could,

Stood gallant like a soldier with her battle wounds.

Under the scorching summer, she wore long sleeves,

Trying to mask the cuts in her wrists which used to bleed.

 

Things were falling in,

And she could no longer stand that grin.

She just knew what was left undone,

A slit on the wrist,

She knew- it’ll be over soon.

Depressed and gloomy.

She was never the same,

It’s the society that should bow down in shame.

 

Gasping, she embraced death,

The suffering was over now at her deathbed.

She tried hard but could no longer fight,

Hence, she boarded her last flight.

Just before her eyes were shut,

She scribbled one last note for her loved ones-

“Try not to hate me, when I am gone,

It will take time, but you’ll forget me, as I am not worth to be dwelled on,

Just know that I loved you and I’ll still be watching on you from the clouds above,

But for now, it’s Goodbye!”

For now, it’s Goodbye!

©Arpita

Would You?

If we started life on a different note,

If we could reverse and rewrite the plots,

Would you have stayed then?

Would you have had a reason to cling on?

Faulty we were or it was the fault in our stars,

The tumultuous journey left all but scars.

Was ‘enough’ just not really enough?

How does one free from those invisible cuffs?

Endless tries to add hues,

Alas! The canvas remains gray.

Crumbling slowly from the deafening silence,

Life yet urges to hold on to the pretence.

Bruised wings trying hard to break open and flutter,

The shackles hold her down each time, how hard she tries no matter. 

Life goes on in a frenzy,

And the thought leaves the inner child crazy.

Tell me-

If we had started life on a different note,

Would you have stayed then?

If we could reverse all back in time,

Would you have stayed back then?

Would you have?

©Arpita

The Disconnect

These days words just don’t come,

It is as though my brain is playing a pun.

Scattered thoughts and vague images,

The connections to them are like illegible traces.

A ‘writer’s block’ is its fancy name,

But-

To call that; would it be sane?

For, strings of thoughts keep lingering on.

Thoughts of color and grey,

Thoughts of bloom and decay,

But words- Oh! Look how these days they swiftly sway away.

This sudden wave of disconnection,

The imbalance in the ‘not so perfect’ concoction,

Wonder what would revive the words in hibernation?

Myriads of images still flash by each second,

A ‘block’ or not? Alas! The predicament.

©Arpita

Lost..

It has been a while now,

The ache just won’t subside.

The sudden flow of pearls in the late hours of the night,

The urge to hold back and countless lost fights.

Struggling to breathe,

Countless scratches on the wrist.

Seeking solace intoxicated,

Yet feeling suffocated.

There seems to be a weight on the chest,

Slowly losing the urge to protest.

Surrounded yet desolate,

A reason for the situation- too difficult to contemplate.

Unknown avengers pinning the soul down,

The warrior seems to have just put the guns down.

Desperate, frantic, unheard shrills,

An inexplicable surge of emotions suddenly fills.

Lost in a maze of the unknown,

Lost or she is long gone?

©Arpita

That Rain

Dark is the sky,

Seems those cotton balls up above are about to cry.

While people around are in haste,

She seemed nonchalant yet poised.

The darkness seems to now evade,

Roaring thunder and lightning seem to fill the sky with a new shade.

There she is standing at her window,

Staring at those droplets of rain rolling down the windowpane,

Lost in a world devoid of pain.

The cold breeze plays with her hair,

Undisturbed she is from the frolic so far.

The soil is now damp and emanates a wet scent,

She takes a deep breath and inhales it to her heart’s content.

It’s been a while and the first storm of the season has now subsided,

She is still there at the window staring in vacuum,

She is still there lost in her own world of equilibrium.

©Arpita

Music- Her Saviour

That night had an eerie silence,

It seemed as though happiness had lost its essence.

Dark clouds enveloped the sky, 

An advancing storm seemed just nearby.

There she was seated in her room,

Haywire thoughts, distant and wrapped in a cocoon.

That little voice playing at the back of her mind,

The feeling of hopelessness, in it she was confined.

The longing to hang on to life slowly was fading away,

That night, she just wanted to ruthlessly end the play.

The deafening silence and her state was now perturbed by the notes of a piano playing at a distance,

She was now at the pavement following the notes, it appeared as though she was hypnotized.

It was her dad’s tune; the flooding memories she just couldn’t brush aside,

That little suicidal voice had now faded and now she woke to conscience.

That tone, that music that night was her saviour in moments of vulnerability and plight,

Music is what fills her soul and lets her shine bright,

Music today is her only guiding light!

©Arpita

@arpita_mukherjee05

 

Create a free website or blog at WordPress.com.

Up ↑

Create your website with WordPress.com
Get started